


All our own

by Wayward_Elle



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Coda, Destiel Becoming Canon On 5 November 2020 (Supernatural), Fix-It, M/M, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-24
Updated: 2020-11-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:54:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,704
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27697913
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wayward_Elle/pseuds/Wayward_Elle
Summary: Supernatural 15x20 fix it
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 4
Kudos: 53





	All our own

Things weren’t the same for Dean anymore, it couldn’t be when the one person he has truly loved beside his brother was gone. He was ripped to pieces, shredded, and each day felt like walking on hot coals. He could no longer go on, no matter how much he tried to. And as if things couldn’t get any worse Jack never answered his prayers, no matter how much he pleaded and cried. It was just silence, one so daunting that it suffocated Dean without even breaking a sweat. Every single minute of that silence brought him closer to death. He couldn’t continue fighting for his breath, fighting to keep his head above water. It was too much, and drowning seemed easier. 

Miracle, could sense his sadness and it wanted nothing more than to take it away as it cuddled up against his new owner and licked his face. It brought comfort to Dean, it was the only thing that brought him comfort since Castiel died. It wasn’t the comfort and love he craved for but it numbed some of the pain and he was grateful for that, grateful that he could breathe, even when it was just for a moment. A moment felt like an eon after all. 

Sam walked in soon after miracle. He was reluctant, not sure what state his brother was in now. It hurt seeing him that way, but what hurt more was how Dean tried to hide his pain from him. He said ‘We need to carry on, keep on living, for the ones we’ve lost' but Sam knew that he didn’t really mean it, he didn’t want to move on, not without Cas, or even Jack. It was impossible for him to. 

“Hey. Eileen and I made dinner. You hungry?” he watched his older brother play with the dog they’ve hardly had for three weeks. He looked peaceful, even through the pain and the layers and layers of that bravado façade he was so good at pulling off, somewhere in between all of that was a tinge of peace. That peace, as tiny as it was, meant that there was hope, it was the light at the end of a long and tedious tunnel.

“Nah, I’m not hungry" He glanced at Sam for just a split of a second before looking back at miracle who’s tongue was hanging from the side of his mouth. It was cute and it brought a smile to Dean’s face. 

“I think I’ll stay with miracle for a while” 

“You haven’t eaten since breakfast, Dean" Sam stepped inside and walked across the room to take a seat on the chair facing Dean’s bed. It was Castiel’s chair but Sam didn’t know that, if he had he wouldn’t have sat on it. 

Dean swallowed hard. Seeing that chair occupied by someone other than the angel was like having his heart sawed out with a butter knife. He couldn’t endure it, not even a second of it.

“don’t sit there!” he snapped. His voice cracking as he spoke. Sam was confused and his brows knit together in concern and uncertainty. He got up without question, not wanting to upset Dean any more than he had already done.

“Cas…” Dean swallowed again. Just the angel’s name coming from his own lips conjuring up the tears he had been suppressing for quite some time. “it’s Cas' chair. He liked sitting there, reading while I would be asleep" he added as he wiped away his tears and held onto miracle who could feel every ounce of pain the hunter felt. 

Sam felt bad for not knowing that and he felt even worse for making Dean talk about it when he clearly wasn’t ready. 

“Dean, I’m so sorry" He didn’t know what to do or where to even stand as his face contorted with guilt and pain. 

“you should get back to Eileen. I’m sure she’s waiting for you" 

“I will” Sam said softly. He turned on his heels and headed for the exit. 

“But Dean…” he stopped himself when he got to the door. He turned around and met his brothers eyes. “I know that this is really hard on you but you’ll be fine. You always are. You’re a fighter and If Cas were here he’d say the exact same thing" he gave him a small smile. Hoping with everything in him that Dean believed his words. 

He did. He knew that eventually he’d be okay, even if it meant having that closure in 50 years, he knew that it would come. 

It got better and yet worse as time went by. Better because he could breathe again. He could smile without feeling guilty and he could talk about moving on, about finding a normal job and a small home where he could live with miracle. Worse because Cas was still gone and that never-ending void in his heart and his soul was still there. Nothing made it better, nothing could make it better. Cas left and took a part of Dean with him, a part of him that he could never get back. He couldn’t do much but ignore it, pretend like it wasn’t there and maybe as time goes he’d forget it was there in the first place. 

“what do you say? Last one before we hang up our hats?” He suggested the case in Canton, Ohio. It was a quick one they reckoned, a milk run compared to what they’ve dealt with in the past. Sam was on board of course, he couldn’t pass it up for anything in the world. 

“What do you plan on doing after retiring? I mean we’ve been hunting since we were kids, you really think we can turn away from it?” Sam raised his brows in concern, not only for themselves but for the lives they wouldn’t be saving anymore. He felt guilty. He didn’t have to because what they didn’t know was that paradise was only around the corner. 

“Of course man. We gave up everything, if we keep on giving we’d be left with nothing. We deserve to live like normal people, at least for a moment. You deserve to be with Eileen and start a new life with her. Me on the other hand, I’ve got miracle and that’s fine, it’s good. He’s all I need" 

Sam smiled and fought the urge not to cry. He didn’t think his brother would make it three weeks past Castiel’s passing but he did. He fought and kept his head above water until he reached the shore. 

They reached Canton in about 15 hours and camped up at a cheap motel. It felt strange for the both of them, the feeling of them doing it one last time was bittersweet. They always hated these motels, the cheap food and the long hours on the road but now that it was their last, they already missed it. They have bonded greatly over the years, the days on the road played a pivotal part in their relationship and now it was slowly turning into nothing but memories. It was a big step for them to take, having counted and leaned on each other each day to going their separate ways was tough as nails, but it needed to be done. They had to break up the band and work on their solo projects. 

They spoke to the local police and pinned everything together in less than two days. It was a vampire nest they were after, an odd one at that. They preyed solely on kids and cut out their witnesses tongues. It was sick but Sam and Dean didn’t even wince, they’ve heard and seen so much worse than that. 

“Vampire mimes" Dean exclaimed, convinced that the name he gave them was good and quite out of the box. It wasn’t but Sam didn’t say anything, he couldn’t possibly take away his brother’s proud smile. It was good to see him smile again— genuinely smile. It was like a breath of fresh air. 

When nightfall came, they were quiet. Excited yet slightly nervous. It was unusual, the fact that after all they’ve been through, a simple vampire hunt still made them nervous. 

They entered the barn they believed the vamps used as a nest and held tightly onto their machetes. The barn was big, dark and had an odd stench. It was probably old dried blood but they weren’t certain. They turned on their heels and marched forward. Their eyes darting from one end of the barn to the other.

A rattling noise and high pitched muffled out screams came from behind a closed door on Sam’s right. He ran towards it without a second thought and broke it down. As he did so, four large, masked vampires came from behind them, and before Sam and Dean could even register what was happening, they were attacked. 

“Go. Go. Get out of here!” Sam instructed the two young boys he found behind the door while Dean tried to keep the monsters occupied for a few seconds, and a few seconds it was— 2.5 to be exact. 

Slice! 

Dean’s machete made a clean cut and with a thud, one of the vampire’s heads landed on the ground. They had it under control, but again, only for a moment. The monsters were suddenly coming out of nowhere. Dean took care of two, Sam took on the other three— two in time and one too late. 

He jumped Dean, pushed him hard against a pole. He could feel something odd as his back slammed against the wooden structure, it stung and he suddenly couldn’t fight, let alone move as the sharp pain pierced through his abdomen and the rest of his body. He smelled blood, an excessive amount of blood, and panic, along with the sharp pain coursed through him. 

“Dean!” Sam exclaimed just before getting rid of the vamp that had his brother pinned. Dean held onto him, his hands shaky and his eyes watery. How does he tell Sam? How does he break his brother’s heart and take away the one thing he never wanted to take from him? He didn’t know how but he knew that he had to. 

“We did it! Come on" Sam didn’t notice the colour slowly drain from Dean’s face and he dldn’t notice the pain and fear in his eyes either, not until Dean stopped him.

“I can’t go anywhere, Sammy” he struggled, his breath slowly slipping away. It took Sam a minute to figure out what was happening and when he did… he felt his world shake, like an earthquake putting an irreparable crack in the core of the planet.

“I’m hurt" 

“you need an ambulance. I need to call you an ambulance now!” he tried to let go but Dean wouldn’t let him, the fear of going through all of that alone was evident in his eyes and the way he pleaded. He needed someone there, to be with him as he takes his last breath.

“you’ll die. I need to get…” 

“Sammy. Don’t do it" he interjected, his words like a plea. Sam was confused. He couldn’t process what he was being told. He didn’t want to.

“It’s my time and I’m okay with that" He wasn’t but he needed to convince Sam that he was. He didn’t know what the future—or afterlife in this case—held for him. He didn’t know if he was going up or down or like Billie promised, the big empty. He was scared. He could have fought, but it was too much… living was too much and even though he feared it, death seemed better. 

He was slipping away. His heartbeat slowing down as each second passed. 

“Dean" it wasn’t Sam’s voice. He was sure that he was hallucinating, being on the brink of death making him go crazy. He would have believed that if he didn’t see, through blurry vision and all, the tan coat before him, taking his brothers place. 

“Cas?” he tried looking at him without passing out. His head hung back heavy as he locked eyes with the angel. It was truly him. He could feel it, not only with the touch of his hand but with his soul. His broken soul felt whole again. 

His tears flowed down his cheeks, uncontrollably as he sobbed. His heart, mending, breaking and mending over and over again. He had him back. But only for a minute. He was still dying and no amount of fighting could save him, it was too late and he could feel it. 

“Don’t say a word” Castiel’s voice cracked as he lifted him up, slowly sliding him out of the giant rebar that penetrated him. It was difficult. The pain it caused Dean made the angel wince, and a pang of guilt tugged at his stomach. 

He sat him down and stretched out his hand, letting it hover over the wounded area. A bright blue light came from his hand, followed by a sharp ping. 

It took five minutes and it took all of Castiel’s grace. Every single ounce of it. It was all gone, flowing around in Dean’s body until it wasn’t anymore. 

He was human but that didn’t matter, what mattered was that Dean Winchester was saved. 

“Are you okay, Dean?” he questioned as Dean stood to his feet, perplexed beyond comprehension. He had so much to say but where was he to start? It was all happening too fast for him to keep track of. 

“how, how are you here?” he questioned, his eyes filled to the brim with tears. 

“Is it really you, Cas?” the first tear dropped and so the others followed. It was really him and Dean could see it. He could see it in his eyes and the way he looked at him. It was Castiel, it was his angel, and he was back.

“You son of a bitch" he pulled the angel close and wrapped his arms around him. It felt almost unreal, neither of them thought that they’d ever get the chance to do that again. 

Dean let go and they both looked to Sam, a petrified one. He still hadn’t processed his brother slipping away a few moments ago. It was beyond traumatizing and not even Castiel’s appearance could shake it right away.

“What the hell?” was all he could come up with, his mouth agape as he stared.

“Hello, Sam" the angel’s smile was one of the purest things Dean had ever seen and he couldn’t control the way his heart jumped out of his chest.

“How are you here?” He questioned and Cas looked to Dean before looking down, unsure of where to begin. 

“Jack” he answered vaguely. Uncertain whether he was ready to even speak the whole truth. Jack brought him back and that was all they needed to know. 

“You’re not going to leave again, are you?” there was something so broken in the way Dean spoke. He heard it and he knew Sam and Cas did too, but he didn’t care if they did… he actually wanted them to know, Cas especially. He needed him to know that he couldn’t go on without him, not really.

“I’m not going anywhere, not for a long time, Dean" the smile on the angels face was like hope on a silver platter. It was everything and more. 

“Good because I’m not letting you go. Not again" Dean said, his fingers trailing up Castiel’s arms. 

Sam watched in anticipation, a proud smile forming on his face. 

“I didn’t get to say it back" he began. His hands cupping Castiel’s face. 

“You didn’t have to" 

“Yeah, well I'm doing it anyway. I love you too, Cas. So damn much” it felt good to say, better than anything he has ever experienced. It was complete bliss and the feeling was infinite. 

They kissed, slowly and so passionately that it felt like what people described complete euphoria to feel like. It was actually better than that but neither of them could find the words to describe it. All they could do was show it, and so they did from that day on till the end of their endless journey.

**Author's Note:**

> Read Infinate after for Castiel's point of view.


End file.
